These sites may help
I feel as though I’m a foreigner in my own country - and the city I’ve lived in for the past 42 years.
As I turn 50 this year, I’ve begun to wonder what it would take to establish a new town here in Oregon - one that would be based upon the very ideals of Ecotopia.
This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes:
…It takes courage to push yourself to places that you have never been before… to test your limits… to break through barriers. And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom…. —-Anais Nin
—Linda Bacon, “Thin Privilege” (via fatandtheivy)
I fight fat-phobia because it’s ugly and mean and I need to save myself from it. I do what I do because I’m really afraid – because I believe that the costs of not challenging this system are too painful for me to bear. My whole world shifted once I understood that. The war that was originally waged against my self – the fat on my body – was more appropriately waged against oppressive attitudes about fat.
One of my favorite quotes:
I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.
—-James Arthur Baldwin (1924-87), American writer, critic
Will it ever end?
BigFeminist found it very easy to discount and marginalize fat male issues even though she had to admit that we have some. Fat women always complain that there is not enough fat men in Fat Acceptance and there will never be many as long as the experiences that fat men are allow to own are so small and controlled.
Fat men do have experiences to share, but it if they are going to be constantly critiqued and put under a microscope Fat Acceptance will not be that appealing.
Today I have been having a discussion with Big Feminist about fat men and their acceptability which she has just chose to end. I was careful not to say anything that suggested what fat women experienced because as a fat guy all I know is what they have shared with me.
BigFeminist seemed to feel entitled to fill in all the answers when it came to what fat men have experienced. I am going out for the afternoon and maybe evening and as a fat guy I will be back to report on any instances of acceptance I experience during my travels.
I posted on bigfeminist’s tumblr site, but tumblr stinks when it comes to relying to a long statement from the owner of the tumblr site because you only have a couple of hundred keystrokes to use.
BigFeminist is answering my question:
…..Why do Fat Feminists act like there are fan clubs out there promoting the existence of fat men? I know we are not the center of focus for fat bias, but I have not seen many positive statements about fat men from society at large or even in Fat Acceptance when you compare how Fat Acceptance deals with fat men and women……
First off I am no way saying that fat men should be the center of the fat acceptance dialogue. I am asking why the topic of fat men and their experiences are pushed into a small corner of Fat Acceptance by so many in Fat Acceptance. In my original comment I acknowledged that fat women take the brunt of fat bias from society. What I am asking is if the lives of fat men are as unaffected by fat bias as some people in Fat Acceptance portray them to be? Do they really believe that fat men do not have to be concerned about body image, that unlike fat women rolls of fat on men are no problem? Do they think all the comments about fat men and moobs on the internet are good hearted?
What I am asking is why do fat feminist think that fat men are so accepted by society and what statements in society are they basing their claims on. I did not ask why fat men are not in part of the center of focus in Fat Acceptance still BigFeminist again points out how fat men are far more acceptable in society than fat women even though there are no conversations in society that support her claims.
BigFeminist goes on to use a study on the sexualization of bodies of teenage girls as if that sheds some light on how fat men are more accepted by society even though society has never showed any evidence that it even approve of the idea of fat men.
Big Feminist goes on to use the storylines of movies some of them not even involving fat males as proof that fat men are more accepted by society. I would be more convinced if I saw some evidence in the mindset of society that stated its approval of fat men.
For some people in Fat Acceptance the fat experiences of fat men will always be a glass half empty instead of half full. A good start to getting a clearer picture of fat men would be if people stopped defining the lives of fat men indirectly by using what other groups experience to define the lives of fat men. Use studies on the lives of fat men instead of studies on fat women, teenage girls, thin men and women that confuse the issue.
The fact that fat women are the public focus for most of society’s fat bias does not communicate much about how society views fat men.